Jedi Master
08-22-2002, 06:32 AM
Q. How do you know when a blonde has been at the computer?
A. There's tipex all over the screen.
Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
A. When you slap a mosquito it stops sucking.
Q. What does a blonde say when you asked her what the last two words of the national anthem are?
A.Play ball.
Q: How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb?
A. One. She holds the bulb and the world revolves around her.
A brunette goes to the doctor and as she touches each part of her body with her finger she says, "Doctor it hurts everywhere. My arm hurts, my leg hurts, my back hurts, my head hurts!" The doctor asks, "Were you ever a blonde?" "Yes, I was." she replies. "Why do you ask?" The doctor answers, "because your finger is broken."
A man was in his yard mowing the grass when his blonde neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it then slammed it shut stormed back in the house. A little later she came out of her house again went to the mail box and again opened it, slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, she came out again, marched to the mailbox, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever. Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something wrong?" To which she replied, "There certainly is!" My stupid computer keeps saying, "You've Got Mail."
Q: What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you?
A: Run like hell... she's got a hand grenade in her mouth.
Three blondes were walking through the forest when they came upon a set of tracks. The first blonde said "those are deer tracks." The second blonde said "No, those are elk tracks." The third blonde said "You're both wrong, those are moose tracks." The Blondes were still arguing when the train hit them.
The blonde had a fire at her house. She called the fire department. the dispatcher says calm down and tell us how we get there. The blond replies Duh! Come in the big red truck.
A. There's tipex all over the screen.
Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
A. When you slap a mosquito it stops sucking.
Q. What does a blonde say when you asked her what the last two words of the national anthem are?
A.Play ball.
Q: How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb?
A. One. She holds the bulb and the world revolves around her.
A brunette goes to the doctor and as she touches each part of her body with her finger she says, "Doctor it hurts everywhere. My arm hurts, my leg hurts, my back hurts, my head hurts!" The doctor asks, "Were you ever a blonde?" "Yes, I was." she replies. "Why do you ask?" The doctor answers, "because your finger is broken."
A man was in his yard mowing the grass when his blonde neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it then slammed it shut stormed back in the house. A little later she came out of her house again went to the mail box and again opened it, slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, she came out again, marched to the mailbox, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever. Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something wrong?" To which she replied, "There certainly is!" My stupid computer keeps saying, "You've Got Mail."
Q: What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you?
A: Run like hell... she's got a hand grenade in her mouth.
Three blondes were walking through the forest when they came upon a set of tracks. The first blonde said "those are deer tracks." The second blonde said "No, those are elk tracks." The third blonde said "You're both wrong, those are moose tracks." The Blondes were still arguing when the train hit them.
The blonde had a fire at her house. She called the fire department. the dispatcher says calm down and tell us how we get there. The blond replies Duh! Come in the big red truck.